Sunday, January 27, 2013

Liberal hypocrisy on Parade

Just turn on the TV and you can see and hear it with your own eyes and ears: when a liberal speaks, inconsistency and hypocrisy flows from their lips.  In other words, they want the rest of us to follow idiotic rules that liberals concoct to keep us all in line, yet they exempt themselves from these rules.  The truth behind their hypocrisy is simple: liberals are many times pragmatic about what works and what doesn't.  Their gun control measures have utterly failed in the past to prevent gun violence, and so they take up arms to prevent this from happening to themselves.  And then these very same hypocrites continue to push for removing guns from the hands of the rest of us of the Great Unwashed - yet these liberal hypocrites keep THEIR guns, and remain armed to the teeth.

Take Sen. Diane Feinstein (D-CA), who has been a pit bull in the rush to grab everyone's guns lately, presumably to end gun violence.  Yet she confesses to having a concealed carry permit to pack heat, since the sincere need for her protection is different from you and me, you see.  She is more important, and therefore exempt from her own rules she would foist on us all.


Ditto with uber-liberal pinko Rosie O'Donnell, who rants and raves about guns being in the hands of everyday citizens, and yet her own personal body guard is armed to the teeth in his efforts to protect this brazen hypocrite.  None of the rest of us deserve protection, oh no.  We of the Great Unwashed are too unimportant to warrant protection.  Rosie O'Donnell, on the other hand, needs armed protection so that she can continue to rant and rave unfettered about all of those guns in the hands of the rest of us. 

Unbelievable.  Such inconsistency from our 'betters.'

Of course, posting armed personnel in public schools in order to protect Joe Q. Sixpack's kids creates shrieks of horror from liberals, to include our most liberal president ever, Barack Obama.  And yet the president's kids (in private schools, of course, he would NEVER stoop to sending his kids to public schools, public schools are only for those within the Great Unwashed, you know), his precious kids are under armed guard twenty four hours a day. 

As for OUR kids, he demands that they spend their educational hours in GUN FREE ZONES.

I think we are starting to see a pattern here: what's good for all of US, as determined by our 'betters,' is unacceptable to impose on those better folk themselves.

Damn liberal hypocrites.  A pox on all of 'em.

Monday, January 21, 2013

How do I know if I'm conservative?

Some folk out there are confused.  They just don't know where they stand politically: are they Red Staters (conservative), or Blue Staters (liberals)?  Well, allow me to clear the air.  If you fit the following criteria, you most certainly can determine where you fit in on the political spectrum:

1.  If your front porch collapses and more than two dogs die, you just might be a Red Stater.

2.  If the size of your residence is determined by 'wides' (single wide, double wide, or if you are extremely wealthy, TRIPLE WIDE), you just might be a Red Stater.

3.  If the highest compliment that can be paid to a local gal is 'say, nice tooth!', then you are probably a Red Stater. 

4.  If, in order to cross the border into your state, you must by law have at least three teeth pulled (preferrably one of the front ones), then you most likely live in a Red State.

5.  If you have at least three non-operational vehicles up on blocks, in addition to two or more non-functional kitchen or laundry room appliances in your front lawn, it is possible that you live in a Red State.

6.  If your working television set is sitting on top of your non-working television set, it's very likely that you are a conservative living in a Red State.

7.  If you attend family reunions to meet girls, then you most definitely reside in a Red State.

8.  If you have no idea how to load, fire or clean a double barrel shotgun, you are most definitely not a resident of a Red State.

9.  If you think that receiving food stamps is a God Given Right, then you are very likely not living in a Red State.

10.  If you voted for Obama (twice), you most definitely do not live in a Red State, although you most certainly do not even know what a Red State is. 

(acknowledgements to Bill Engvall, Jeff Foxworthy and Larry the Cable Guy for their valuable input).

Friday, January 18, 2013

Manti Te'o: all this fuss to cover his being gay

We keep hearing how strange and stranger this story gets regarding Manti Te'o's non-existent girl friend who was the love of his life.  It's not strange at all if we consider the possibility that answers almost every weird question: he fabricated a girl friend to cover up the fact that he is gay.

Manti Te'o has a lot to lose if he's outed as a homosexual.  Nobody in the NFL is gay, at least not that we know of.  Should the facts come to light, there goes the huge bucks that being a top draft pick would bag.

And what about his family gushing over the ghost girl friend, telling everybody they met her?  They would know about Manti's sexual orientation, and are aware that they need to play ball in this masquerade in order to cash in on his football career themselves. 

So far, all of this checks out in filling in the holes in this story.

He's a good looking guy, got everything going for him, but no girl friend in sight.  What's up with that?  Did you notice how many hot chicks that Johnny Football has been seen with since his Heismann?  And how about A.J. McCarron's latest squeeze, Miss Alabama? Colin Klein? Married. But zilch girls with Manti.  Zip, nada in the babe department.

It's quite likely that Notre Dame is in on the gay Manti Te'o story as well and sat on the news also, as it would not help their program to have this come out, much akin to the Penn State mess.  No, they can't have that, bad for recruiting, etc., and are sticking with Manti's story about being 'catfished,' bamboozled, duped and fooled.

This is the most likely story here: Manti Te'o is gay, and will soon be expected to start wearing some arm candy, and  so we come up with a far away, unreachable 'girl friend,' and everything is solved.  Then the girl croaks, and Manti pines away for years over the loss of his soul mate. See how this works out?

The only problem with this theory is that since it's a conspiracy, eventually somebody rats out the scheme for the money, and that would likely entail the male love interest in Manti's life.  So far, silence from the boyfriend. 

But it's only a matter of time before we meet Manti Te'o's true love interest. 

Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Why Liberals think Conservatives are Evil

Just ask any card carrying, dues paying liberal what they think of conservatives.  The pejorative expletives and vitriolic venom that will inexorably spew from the liberal's maw in response to such an inquiry should give you a hint that they just don't like conservatives very much. 

But why would this be?  It's simple, really: conservatives' views, if implemented via legislation, will significantly cramp a liberal's lifestyle. 

And when a liberal's lifestyle is cramped, they consider whoever is doing the cramping to be flat out evil.  Why else would somebody purposely cramp a liberal's activities?  Nothing else explains this except the 'evil' theory.

Liberals truly believe that they should be allowed to do anything that feels good, regardless of the consequences.  Liberals believe that all drugs should be legal, and if they really push hard, free.  Liberals believe that anybody should be able to marry any thing, regardless of whether it be animal, vegetable or mineral, since why would anyone be against true love?  If a liberal wants to marry a turnip, who is to stand in the way of their heart's desire?

Only evil sorts would want to inhibit this, obviously.  And conservatives fit that bill.  Just pure evil, these rotten jerks, standing in the way of true love.  Speaking of true love, hard core liberals also believe that adults should be able to have sex with children, if it is in a truly loving relationship.  NAMBLA (North American Man-Boy Love Association) is getting a bad rap owing to its opposition from conservatives, there they go again standing in the way of true love.  How evil can you get, these liberals ask.

Of course, there's also the widely known fact that conservatives are just plain mean spirited and cruel when talking about wealth redistribution.  These evil conservative jerks oppose having their money taken away from them via confiscatory taxation and given to those less fortunate.  Can you believe how evil that is?  Pure evil, the liberals say.

Just ask any average, any run of the mill liberal how evil conservatives are.  And you don't need to hunt down a dyed-in-the-wool hard core liberal who brings three bean salad to all the liberal picnics to get this line of reasoning.  Any old liberal who falls off a log truly thinks that conservatives are pure evil, the veritable spawn of Satan.

Conservatives are a bucket of cold water on their desires, a wet blanket on their wishes to be free.  Those damn, rotten evil conservatives.

Tuesday, January 8, 2013

Television shows that will rot your brain

The following programs, if you watch them regularly, will be guaranteed to turn you into what are now called 'low information voters.'  Or, the more technical term: a moron.  If you actually enjoy watching the following garbage that passes for modern television programming, it will literally transform your brain into rotten goo.

Without further ado, allow me to list the most damaging programs ever concocted by Hollywood guaranteed to turn anyone's brain into pus, and accordingly an Obama voter:

"Here Comes Honey Boo Boo".  A reality series that launched in the summer of 2012, this crap when airing opposite the Republican National Convention was the most watched program of the evening among viewers aged 18 - 49.  Portraying the lower socio-economic layer in U.S. culture, this program basically covers white trash and idiots living in the rural South (Georgia), as the program follows the exploits of a portly trailer trash mother who touts her pudgy little moron daughter as a beauty pageant contestant.  The goal of the show is to achieve ratings by making the viewers feel superior to the retards on the show, and the producers go to great lengths to point out the low IQ of all involved.  Prolonged exposure to this show will eventually lead to a total devastation of the cerebral cortex and complete loss of brain cells. Or, in other words, create a die hard Obama voter.

"The Bachelor/Bachelorette." This God awful dreck has been airing annually for over 10 years now,  and is completely devoid of any substance or reality, although it is considered a 'reality' show.  Premise: a good looking single gal chooses a fiance' from ten or so handsome, single guys ('The Bachelorette' premise, vice versa for the Bachelor).  Nothing whatsoever filmed on this show are actual real live conversations between the participants, and so far no 'couple' created by this bung hole of a show has ever resulted in a marriage of any substance.  Mostly a chick show, sobbing women viewers, handkerchiefs firmly in hand and/or nose are mostly at risk after repeated exposure to become mentally impaired, and accordingly descend into  the despair typical of the pathetic Obama voter.

 "American Idol." Also entering its 11th year, this horrible series consists of snobby, arrogant celebrities judging the singing talent of unknown contestants, and viewers are mesmerized by the insults and degradation heaped upon obvious plants of no-talent singers, while obsequiously gushing over the more talented contestants.  How anyone with an IQ of room temperature or higher can stomach a single moment of this show is beyond my comprehension.  This unmitigated pile of puke programming will without a doubt turn any viewer's brain into stinking, fetid goo after only a few minutes.  Prolonged viewing will damage the brain of any voter and will most certainly benefit Obama in his bid for a third term (he will ignore the 22nd Amendment much like he ignores the rest of the Constitution).

"Survivor." How any reasonably intelligent person can watch even a second of this perennial filth boggles the imagination.  Even so, the producer Mark Burnett uses  fabricated and phony conflict and treachery among the participants to spice up this stupid show and create as hostile an environment among the cretins participating in what the brain damaged audience loves to see: back stabbing, lying, cheating, stealing and manipulating.  It's hard to believe that this show was based on Johann David Wyss' classic novel published in 1812 titled "Swiss Family Robinson." Guaranteed to damage the brain beyond all capacity, and thus skewing towards Obama's vote tallies to perhaps 6 terms in office if not more. 

Monday, January 7, 2013

Hurricane Sandy 'victims' nothing more than bold gamblers who lost

Governor Chris Christie (R-NJ), love him or hate him, is really pushing hard to ensure that incredulously uninsured 'victims' of Hurricane Sandy who lost their homes to the surge of tidal waters are made whole at no cost to themselves.  But who else should pay for this destruction?

Not the 'victims,' who chose to build on known flood planes. Without a dime of insurance. No, no, they should not have to pay one red cent, according to Gov. Christie.  Nope, it's the REST OF US who need to keep these people in the lap of luxury on the beaches of New Jersey in the form of massive federal disaster relief.

It galls me that all of these 'victims,' who are really not victims at all but rather bold gamblers and moochers, demand that we as a nation buck up and help them when times are tough, and the known risks came home to roost in their known flood planes upon which they built luxury waterfront condos and mansions.  It wasn't just an ancient human memory that a massive surge destroyed these lands back in antiquity.  A major storm destroyed the very same area that these bold gamblers chose to settle in 1944!!  That was not a very long time ago at all, folks. 

These 'victims,' or bold gamblers as I prefer to call them, now want money from the federal government (and that would consist of everybody else except the bold gambler) to pay to rebuild their condos, mansions and docks, and restore their opulent motor yachts on this luxurious waterfront property....YET AGAIN.  And they want to enjoy this private waterfront property at no cost to themselves until the next storm comes along. And in the interim, we the American public will be denied access to the private property that our tax dollars rebuilt.  NO TRESPASSING signs will be everywhere on these bold gambler's and moocher's freshly rebuilt private waterfront property.

The next storm that decimates this known flood plane is not an 'if:'  it WILL come and destroy this place again, and it's not even arguable.

And WHEN, not IF, we succumb to the sob stories that these bold gamblers put out there, and cough up to rebuild their opulent digs on these known flood planes, these bold gamblers and their heirs in the future will YET AGAIN extend their hands out to the rest of us when their yachts and mansions are swept out to the angry Atlantic ocean in a future storm surge.

Governor Christie, God love you as a God fearing conservative.  But this SOCIALIST plea to the federal government to bail out these bold gamblers is not becoming of a conservative.  Let these folks insure their properties like everybody else who lives in perilous conditions.  Such as dumb ol' Fredd, who lives in the northern climes of 'Tornado Alley.'  The likelihood of dumb ol' Fredd getting wiped out or killed by a tornado is low, but it is not zero percent probability.  Accordingly, dumb ol' Fredd pays annually for 'TORNADO INSURANCE.'

Let these bold gamblers and moochers pay their own way to enjoy their waterfront digs.  Stop trying to squeeze the rest of us, Gov. Christie. 

Friday, January 4, 2013

2012's Top Ten Most Frustrating Episodes in America

I would describe 2012, a year that shall live in infamy, as one of profound frustration at best.  Nothing went our way, in regards to improving the average U.S. citizen's general lot in life.  The economy floundered, our military gained no victories, our future is less secured, and our culture degraded and cheapened.

Without further ado, allow me to list the United State's Top Ten Most Frustrating Moments of 2012:

1.  The re-election of President Barack Obama.  In elections past, his record over the last four years would have sealed a landslide defeat.  But not this time around, no siree Bob.  Unemployment hovering at historically disastrous levels, loss of our AAA credit rating, the entrenching of a bound for failure universal health care policy, a resurgent al Qaeda terrorist movement throughout the world, and a demonstrably massive surge towards socialism, all owing to Obama's Marxist leanings, liberal socialist philosophy and hatred for the principles of the founding of our country.  This moment was a God awful loss for freedom in America going forward. 

2.  Democrats retain control of the U.S. Senate.  Yes, a disaster for the U.S.  This bunch under the leadership of Harry Reid (D-Nv) has not passed a budget in over three years, in order to hide the fact that they are spending money like insane lunatic drunken sailors.  This bunch of slugs pigeon hole all bills submitted to the Senate by the GOP and disregard the legislation passed by the Republican controlled House simply because they can.  What a disaster for us.

3.  Four Americans killed in the U.S. consulate in Benghazi, Libya.  During a 7 hour seige on a U.S. compound, which was clearly imminent and published, four Americans including the Libyan ambassador were murdered while the U.S. Department of State and Department of Defense assets stood idly by, and ordered reinforcements to stand down, allowing these men to die.  Absolutely shameful.  And to this day, nobody has been held accountable for the list of mistakes made as long as my arm. 

4.  Republican Party remains in the hands of moderate leaders who despise conservative values.  John Boehner (R-Oh) remains the Speaker of the House, and has lately removed any and all Tea Party affiliates from legislative committees if they scored poorly on his 'Moderation' report card.  This guy is simply a Democrat who can't bring himself to admit that he hates conservative policies because they put a crimp into his moderate lifestyle.  And yet we re-affirm his leadership time and again, despite the fact that he has been a failure in conservative promotion ever since he was majority whip back in Denny Hastert's 'Mark Foley' congress in 2005 and 2006.

5.  A record 47,710,324 Americans are on food stamps, as of September 2012.  Disgraceful.  Back in the day, anyone on public assistance (welfare) was looked down on, scorned, and even shunned.  But not now, no way Jose.  We have made it so easy to take money from our neighbors in the form of food stamps that we just issue debit cards with food stamp balances on them, instead of the colored food stamp certificates in days gone by that some would be ashamed to submit to a grocer for payment.  Gone are those days, we now have approximately one in six Americans on food stamps and they think nothing of it.  We have to borrow forty cents of every dollar the U.S. government spends on these programs, and one in six of Americans have no problem with this .  A scandal of epic proportions, this lack of shame by 15% of all Americans.  Our culture in this country has gone to the dogs.

6.  Americans mourn the death of Whitney Houston for a week or more.  I'm sad for her family, but having said this, Miss Houston was one of the most irresponsible public figures we have seen come down the pike in the U.S.  Rampant drug use, disrespect for any and all American institutions with her public profanity and shameless behavior for perhaps a quarter of a century.  And we put this disgraceful woman's death in the same perspective as the passing of Mother Theresa.  How far we have fallen, folks.  Ditto with Michael Jackson's passing a few years ago, but we are focusing on 2012.

7.  Chief Justice John Roberts affirms The Affordable Healthcare Act (Obamacare). Roberts ruled on the contorted logic that the basis of the law's confiscatory monetary support is indeed a tax, not a mandated fee.  This, despite the Obama administration attorney's arguing before the SCOTUS that is was in no way a tax.  What a slug in the gut.  A stomp in the face of Americans, and this ruling from arguably a rock ribbed conservative.  This ruling will be engraved in shame on John Robert's tombstone, as the enabler of Socialist America.  America passed over into socialism with this ruling, a ruling that will have lasting and immeasurably damaging consequences. 

8.  Democrats use a madman's rampage in Newtown CT as an excuse to push for gun control.  Despite the Second Amendment to the Constitution, liberals are frothing at the mouth to grab private citizen's guns and leave an American population defenseless and unarmed against criminals who will always be armed to the teeth.  No gun law has ever worked, ever ever.  Duh!!  Does any reasonable person think that if we eliminate guns from law abiding citizens, that criminals will give up their guns?  Not a chance, this is why they are called criminals.
9. Hot off the presses - the U.S. didn't fall off the Fiscal Cliff. No, we deferred going off of this Cliff for another two months, and passed a bill loaded with pork, new spending and not a dime of spending cuts. Good thing we have a countervailing effect owing to retaining control of the U.S. House of Representatives, right? We just kicked the can down the road, yet again.

10.  Rap music is still popular in 2012.   For the life of me, I will never understand (nor do I want to understand) why this no-talent garbage has lasted for so long in popular culture.  Lyrics by gangsters who 'sing' of 'ho's and b*tches, killing police, killing Caucasians and their babies and all other manner of vile and disgusting topics rule the music charts.  Yet these rap 'artists' make millions of dollars every year, and their God awful recordings are as popular as ever.  This genre of music should have died 20 years ago, but didn't.  Too bad.