Wednesday, March 7, 2012

'Women's Studies' essay test

Please answer the following in essay form.  If your answers in any way suggests that patriarchal transgressors receive less than 5 years in a federal penitentiary, please explain your erroneous thought process in detail.

1.  A hard working woman does not get a promotion at her company, managed by evil patriarchal men who obviously have a gender bias in all management decisions.  The position went to a man, who by definition got the job because of gender bias.  Please explain which course of action the aggrieved woman should take: A) sue the biased patriarchal management in civil court for a minimum of $5,000,000 for sexual discrimination, or B) sue the biased evil patriarchal management in criminal court for sexual harassment.

2.  A hard working woman notices at her oppressive place of employment that while the women's restroom facility is labeled 'ladies', the opposite sex's facility is only labeled 'men', instead of a sign that correctly identifies the users of such facilities as 'patriarchal sexist pigs'.  Should the aggrieved woman: A) sue the patriarchal sexist pig management for $5,000,000 in civil court for encouraging a hostile work environment, or B) sue the pigs in criminal court for sexual harassment.

3.  A hard working woman overhears a male co-worker talking about the sewer construction outside their office building, and hears the chauvinist pig mention a 'manhole cover,' clearly a derogatory term applied to such a device as to demean women, instead of correctly calling it a 'personhole cover.' Should the aggrieved woman: A) file a complaint with the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission to compel the male chauvinist pig to attend sensitivity training, or B) sue the company in civil court for $5,000,000 for encouraging a hostile work environment, or C) consult with a women's issue attorney to determine if the offending male chauvinist pig co-worker is subject to a criminal indictment, and accordingly seek imprisonment for the filthy scumbag. 

Remember, there are no right or wrong answers here.  Please select only one of the alternatives listed in your answer, explain in detail why you support that alternative, and when you are through turn your papers in to Professor Mallory Stikituem.

10 comments:

Hack said...

These tests are awesome. Keep em coming!

Fredd said...

Hack:

But are you able to PASS them? I sure hope so....

Silverfiddle said...

This is awesome Fredd, showing your feminine side. You should be congratulated. Maybe they'll give you the Margaret Sanger Award!

;)

Fredd said...

Silver: to be included in the nominees for the Margaret Sanger award just sends shivers up my spine: lumped in with former award winners LBJ, Ted Turner and Bella Abzug, that would be a legacy I would bear forever....

(with shame).

Kid said...

I recommend all women be disallowed voting, working and driving rights immediately. There would be no more lawsuits and "tension building up between the sexes".

Fredd said...

Kid:

While you're at it, why not slap bhurkas on these gals?

Just a thought....

Z said...

I guess you'd love that I refer to that Florida Senator as Debbie WasserPERSON Schultz? :-)
Actually, it's not my cleverness, it's Beamish's. Wonderful, isn't it?
I mean, she doesn't really want MAN in her name, DOES SHE? !

Fredd said...

Z:

I prefer Rush's pronunciation: Debbie Blabbermouth Schultz.

And I'll bet she's got a Ph.D in women's studies....

Kid said...

I was kidding of course Fredd. IN a weird mood I was.

Fredd said...

Kid:

Yeah, I knew that.