You can't be both. Either you, as an American citizen or other human who is breathing American air and treading on American soil, are a net positive to the U.S. gross domestic product (GDP), or you are a negative to GDP. That math is easy. (Yes, to quibble, you can net out at zero, but that category of folk are statistically insignificant, and accordingly irrelevant to the discussion).
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Are you pulling the wagon, or are you in the wagon?
You can't be both. Either you, as an American citizen or other human who is breathing American air and treading on American soil, are a net positive to the U.S. gross domestic product (GDP), or you are a negative to GDP. That math is easy. (Yes, to quibble, you can net out at zero, but that category of folk are statistically insignificant, and accordingly irrelevant to the discussion).
Friday, December 10, 2010
What's it feel like to be a parasite, Americans?
You know who you are. As much as 50% of working age and retired U.S. citizens are moochers, in addition to untold millions of illegal aliens. Since you know who you are, I am talking to you, dead beats.
Monday, December 6, 2010
Econ 101 for Dummies (a.k.a. Econ 101 for liberals)
There is virtually no disagreement that liberal leftists simply do not understand basic economics, and if they do, their understanding is based on feelings rather than logic. Because leftists constantly seem to get themselves elected to public office and accordingly are afforded voting rights on how best to allocate public resources, they vote with their feelings instead of with any knowledge of basic economics. This is very damaging to the country, and we need to bring these simpletons up to speed in how the economy works.
Perhaps a lesson in economics, and specifically taxation policy, expressed in terms of feelings and emotions rather than in cold, hard difficult to understand charts and graphs, you know, those constructs that leftists eschew, would be more helpful. Let’s start with a basic premise that all of us would agree upon: if you had $100 in your pocket, and a stranger came up to you, reached into your pocket and took $40 and told you ‘I need this money to help someone else, because they don’t have any,’ you would feel bad, wouldn’t you? That wouldn’t seem fair, would it?
Of course not. But when the local, state and federal governments do exactly this to American populations, leftists see absolutely nothing wrong with this. Those of us on the right have a huge problem with the government doing this, so liberals and conservatives see the issue of confiscatory taxation from two different points of view. Which of them is right? Well, if you agreed with the basic premise above that taking money from one American and arbitrarily giving it to another is wrong and hurtful, then the conservative argument would be more likely to prevail.
Let’s expand the basic premise somewhat, shall we? Let’s say that this stranger, whose hand is currently inside your pocket snatching that $40 of your $100, tells you ‘this $40 will be better spent on stuff by people that have no money than what you would have done with it, anyway.’ How would you feel about this statement? Would you dare to ask the stranger why he thinks this, and by what basis he came to that conclusion? Would you feel bad if the stranger just ignored your protests, and just took your money anyway? Of course you would. You would probably even get angry.
Of course you would get angry. But when state, local and federal legislators get together and vote on budgets, projects and expenditures, they calculate exactly how much and how deep to reach into our pockets to fund these at times foolish, arbitrary and wasteful programs. All that is needed are simple majorities in the various legislative bodies to empower spending of our money in this manner, and leftist, liberal Democrats (and RINO's; Republicans in Name Only, also known as liberals) are usually the legislators who propose such spending, not conservative legislators. Who is right and who is wrong about this process? The liberal leftists are wrong, if you agree with the expanded premise above that these liberal legislators do not know how to spend your money any better than you do.
And finally, let’s take that premise to its full reality. Let’s say that this stranger, whose hand is now into your pocket up to his elbow, greedily grabbing $50 now, not the $40 he told you when he first reached into you pocket, tells you ‘I’m taking this money to spend as I see fit, because you don’t need this much money, anyway. You have too much.’ How would you feel then? Angry? Insulted? How does this stranger know what is ‘too much,’ anyway? Does he know you or your circumstances? Does he know that you have four children who would like to go to college but have inadequate college funds? Does he bother to think that you would like to leave some of your money to your children when you die? No, this stranger doesn’t take any of that into consideration. That’s not right, is it? And that makes you mad, doesn’t it?
This concludes our emotion, feelings based discussion on taxation policy as is promoted by leftist liberals in our local, state and federal legislative bodies. Based on our discussion, how do you feel about how our tax policy is working out?
If it makes you angry, frustrated and insulted, perhaps you would be better served voting for conservatives next election.
You’ll feel better.
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Obama: our weakest president ever?
In the good ol' days, when an enemy declared war on the U.S. or in any way threatened our national interests, whether it was the Barbary Pirates during the Jefferson administration, Spain during the McKinley administration, or Germany and Japan, during FDR's administration, whoever was in charge at the time (the President) would take care of business. Monday, November 22, 2010
Barbara Bush: elite, Ruling Class snob
On the conservative side, we have red, white and blue patriotic Americans who believe, much like Superman, in truth, justice and the 'American Way.' Lately, the conservatives have been split along two main fractures: the common conservative and the elite conservative.
Saturday, November 13, 2010
We're all just stupid rubes and hayseeds, you see
Monday, November 8, 2010
Barack Obama and Michael Jackson: identical twins
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
What's up with the #1 Oregon Ducks?
The Oregon Ducks football team is going to win the national championship this year. For the first time.
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Even though it's best to never mention the no-hitter while it's in progress, I am not entirely convinced that it applies to the Ducks football program this year. I don't see any team coming within 20 points of them. Am I confident? Yup. Over confident? Depends on one's perspective and insight into what sets the Ducks apart this year.
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Of course, Fredd is a fiercely loyal Duck fan and alumnus who is optimistic about his teams' chances this year, but that doesn't necessarily diminish what the Ducks are doing differently than every other team in the NCAA the last few years.
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And yes: the Ducks are doing something differently than the rest of the college ranks. What's that, Fredd, you say. Well, I'll be glad to tell you. Read on, please......
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Many chalk the relatively recent success to their skills at implementing the 'West Coast no huddle Offense.' While this is certainly a big factor in their hugely productive offense, this is not the sole, nor even primary reason why they win football games by large margins. Lots of teams are using the West coast offense. Most of the Pac 10, frankly, so what is different about the Ducks?
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In the past, the paradigm of recruiting has changed a few times. In the olden days, it was seen that physical size vs fitness and/or athletic ability on the offensive and defensive line was paramount, and was much more effective in using very large men, often of dubious physical conditioning. Great big fat guys on both sides of the line won the day against smaller but more athletic and well conditioned athletes. This was the case up until perhaps the mid 1950's, when a different type of athlete was seen: Ed "Big Daddy" Lipscomb of the LA Rams was not only a huge man physically, at 6'4" and 220, but he was exceptionally quick, and would blow by the slightly larger but much slower and fatter offensive linemen of the day.
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Then began the era of ever increasing size and more importantly, speed of linemen, both offense and defense. Mark Gastineau of the Jets and Reggie White of the Packers epitomized the evolution of this strategy in winning football games: get great big fast guys, don't worry about their conditioning a great deal, as long as they can go at it for 4 seconds out of every 35.
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While offensively, this strategy is still sound, as the defensive tackle or end must spend much more energy each play to prevail. Accordingly, size , a modicum of speed, but not necessarily conditioning, is still the formula for success on offense. This is no longer the case on defense. Smaller, faster and better conditioning on defense is what we see today.
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But wait.....the Oregon Ducks have taken yet another step in recruiting defensive athletes. Up until the last few years, collegiate recruiting focused on talent emanating from high school football programs. While this is still a lucrative pool, Oregon recruiters are focusing on elite track and field athletes, many of whom have never set foot on a gridiron. Speed is what wins the day. Speed and size. The Ducks look for world class sprinters in superb physical condition first, size second and football moves and savvy last. This is new and effective: they sign Olympic class sprinters, keep their conditioning regimens in place, and start to teach them the subtleties of playing defense.
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And where do these Oregon recruiters find these elite athletes? They simply need only to walk out of their office doors and see them everywhere: Eugene, Oregon is also called 'Track Town, U.S.A.': this campus is where the Olympic tryouts for track and field are held every four years, and where some of the world's elite athletes train. This is where Phil Knight invented his track shoe with a waffle iron (which later became 'Nike', perhaps you've heard of them). These football coaches have long been wondering what it would be like to have a safety with the kind of speed that they see at lunch working out at Heyward Field. Well, now they know.
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Speed and conditioning, when added with a modicum of size, is winning the day now. While during their redshirt year, these elite athletes are easily fooled by simple misdirection plays that most high school football players are wise to, but they learn quickly and are relatively up to speed when it comes time for them to start at the red-shirt freshman varsity level. They will make more mistakes than typical of freshmen who have been playing football since Pop Warner days, but will have the blinding speed to often overcome them, and given their second and third years, become fearsome defenders.
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Speed, speed speed. The Oregon Ducks, man for man, have the fastest - by far - and best conditioned defense in college football. They are not necessarily the smallest by any means, but are smaller than any of the elite teams in the Top 25 today.
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The Ducks are the only team in Division One NCAA football who have perfected this concept. And it is paying off. In the first half of any football game, they give up yards and points to physically larger but slower teams, but in the second half, those larger legs are tired, where the speedy, Olympic class smaller athletes are still fresh, and have the stamina, strength and most importantly, blazing speed to stymie even the most experienced, talented offense in the third and especially the fourth quarter of play.
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The Ducks did not invent this method of recruiting. The Dallas Cowboys toyed with this concept in the mid1960s, but abandoned it after awhile by signing Olympic Gold medal winning sprinter Bob Hayes, who although played back up half back on his high school football team, never really had a basis in football. Bob Hayes was successful with the Cowboys because of his blazing speed, but was often criticized for consistently dropping easy passes while wide open. This strategy has not been pursued with vigor by any organization since....except the Oregon Ducks.
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So we have a new paradigm: rather than recruit talented football players from high school and start building them up in the gym, recruit elite sprinters and teach them the game of football, while keeping them in the gym. Nobody is doing that except the Ducks. But the cat is now out of the bag, teams will start doing this in full force in the next few years, after the Ducks win a national championship or two in the meantime.
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Go Ducks.
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Joy Behar blasts Sharron Angle as 'evil,' 'moron' and 'bitch.'
Whoever said 'we can disagree without being disagreeable?' Regardless of who said it originally, apparently Joy Behar of ABC's 'The View' never heard about it. In her left wing world, it's OK to call anyone who disagrees with her world view nasty names, and think nothing of it.
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Apparently, Nevada senatorial candidate Sharron Angle (R-NV) fits into this category with Joy Behar. Behar called Angle 'evil,' 'moron' and 'bitch' all within about 5 seconds on 'The View' yesterday. And this is not really anything new. The Left, of which Joy Behar knows the secret Lefty handshake, attends all the Lefty meetings, pays all the Lefty dues and brings three bean salads to all the Lefty picnics, has no qualms about being as disagreeable as possible when it comes to debating the issues with those whom she vehemently disagrees.
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And with center-right cable news guy Bill O'Reilly, Joy Behar and her leftie comrade-in-arms Whoopie Goldberg got into a major league snit and stormed out of the studio when O'Reilly made the obvious statement that Muslims killed Americans on 9/11 last week. Keep in mind that Bill O'Reilly is no card carrying Republican conservative by any means. He most certainly does NOT know the Republican secret handshake, does NOT pay the dues, and most assuredly does NOT bring three bean salads to the Republican picnics. And Joy lumps this guy in with the rest of that evil, Republican crowd.
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Anyone who is slightly to the right of Karl Marx is an enemy to Joy Behar, and as such are fair game for calling them names such as evil, moronic bitches.
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For the record, it's not just Joy Behar that's disagreeable. It's most of the Left. Gubernatorial candidate Meg Whitman (R-CA) has been called a liar, a Nazi and a whore by supporters of (and the wife of) former governor Jerry Brown (D-CA), and this is all taken in stride by the Leftist mainstream media. Just another day at the office, another evil moronic Republican bitch to disparage. Even writing about this is a story similar to 'dog bites man,' and as such is simply nothing new.
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But now this disagreeable act from the Left is getting awfully old with the American public.
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These Leftists are in for some refreshing 'come-uppance' in a few days, when the voting public shows what they think of our current Leftist environment and it's disagreeableness.
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Americans didn't vote for socialism
Just 21 short months ago, Americans elected the first black president; an astonishing, historic moment in a nation that just three or four generations ago still saw blacks drinking from separate water fountains from whites, and eating at separate lunch counters from whites.
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Barack Obama was supposedly the politician that would bring America together, and that his message of 'hope and change' would transform all Americans' lives for the better. He would lower the seas (he said that during the campaign), and nobody making more than $250,000 would see a dime of increased taxes.
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Remember his speech a few years ago that promised a nation coming together as one, not red and blue, but purple. His administration would be transparent, and that all bills pending before the congress would be published on the Internet 72 hours before they were voted on, so that the public could see what the legislation contained. No special interests or lobbyists would be part of his administration.
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Remember all of that? It wasn't long ago at all.
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Barack Obama has not kept one lousy promise he made during his campaign. Not one. He instead has spent all of his efforts in jamming socialism down our throats, and taking over banks and car companies and student loans and socializing medical care, and on and on....
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And in 21 short, brief months since his inauguration, all of his popularity, his coat tails and his promises of 'hope and change' are completely gone. Vanished. And why? Because this is not the guy whom all of those bamboozled voters voted for. This guy is a brazen, shameless Marxist socialist, and Americans want no part of that, and never did.
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With the general elections coming up in just days, not even Democrats want to be seen with this guy. His appearance on the stump for any Democrat running for any office at all is the kiss of death and they are running away from him in droves if they even hear he is headed their way. He has demolished his own party by implementing his Marxist ideology, and by doing so has thrown hundreds of Democrats under the bus. Even rock solid seats such as Barney Frank (D-Ma), Russ Feingold (D-Wi) and Babs Boxer (D-Ca) are now toss ups to retain their offices.
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What a turn around. It's astonishing, actually, to see the complete reversal of fortunes based on this ideologues' tin ear as to what governing is all about. He will watch as his party goes down the toilet the week after next, and he will probably blame us, the American people, for not having the brains to understand how much he has done for us.
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Everyone entering that voting booth on November 2nd, 2010 knows full well what Barack Obama has done for us: 10% unemployment, and trillion dollar deficits as far as the eye can see. He is the mastermind of one of the largest landslide reversals of congressional power in our life times. And he accomplished this in just 21 short, brief months. Incredible.
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Barack Obama has done nothing FOR us, but has done an enormous amount of damage TO us. Make no mistake: this upcoming election is an unmitigated, unmistakable referendum on this president. Americans want nothing to do with socialism, and this election will point that out with gusto.
Monday, October 18, 2010
What has America done for me lately?
I really want to know, exactly what HAS this country done for me lately? Has it put a new Lexus in my driveway? NO. Has it funded a beach front condo for me and my progeny to retire in? NO. And what about my kitchen, huh? It has needed new cabinets, floor covering and appliances since the Clinton administration. Where is my country when I need it?
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Slacking, mooching Social Security geezers
There's a political ad running in Illinois right now depicting old, decrepit angry geezers admonishing a young conservative politician to keep his hands off of their 'so-security.' These whiny, pathetic geezers were lambasting the conservative politician because he dared suggest that perhaps we should consider raising the retirement age for 'so-security' in the face of an imminent collapse of this ill-conceived FDR-era Ponzi scheme.
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Upcoming 'Lame Duck' session and the political carnage in store for us
The control of both houses of Congress will change on January 4th, 2011. Although we all can argue today about our guesses as to the peripheral details of the composition of the 112th Congress which will be decided on November 2nd, 2010, I am confident that regardless of the size of the GOP majority, the Republicans will have control of both houses next year.
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Thursday, September 30, 2010
European-style Socialism sucks: trust me, I've lived through it
The mental image that many Americans have when someone brings up the 'European lifestyle' is of relaxed Continental, metro-sexual types sipping espresso on a Tuesday morning in Paris, while soaking up the glorious morning sun at a sidewalk bistro on the Champs de Elysee.
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Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Teacher's unions will be the death of us all
'Waiting for Superman' is a film highly critical of our educational system, and particularly the public teacher's unions who hold our children's futures hostage for their own pathetic benefit. There is no greater evil present among the civilized than those who use children as pawns, whether hiding behind them as Islamic terrorists do to avoid being shot at and bombed, or these public teachers unions who through the tenure system deny our children a decent education because they are more concerned about their lucrative and indecent public pensions than they are about the quality of children's education and their future.
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Monday, September 20, 2010
You just might be a Democrat if.....
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
ABC News thinks all money belongs to government
ABC World News, with Dan Harris sitting in for the lovely and gracious (but liberal) Diane Sawyer, just doesn't get it, nor does anyone at ABC. And likely they never will. There was a segment that aired on ABC yesterday with Dan Harris speaking on a segment of 'Taxing the Rich."
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Tuesday, September 7, 2010
You just might be one of the 'Great Unwashed.'
How does one know if they qualify to be a member of 'The Great Unwashed?' You know, those folks whose malodorous presence within smelling distance of our Ruling Class draws a wrinkled nose from the inconvenienced Elite who has the misfortune of sniffing the stench of such a lowly person.
Sunday, August 29, 2010
So Lefties are suddenly all for religous freedom?
Why all of a sudden do we hear a cacophonous clamour from the Left for religious tolerance regarding the hated proposed Ground Zero mosque? They are now calling all of those who oppose this ill advised project 'intolerant.'
When did this happen? It came straight out of the blue: the Left is now all in favor of freedom of religion? It seems to me that the Left has for most if not all of my life (and I'm OLD) have made fun of Christians, Jews and about every other form of religion out there. Lefties and pinkos of every shape and size were particularly and rabidly fond of bashing Catholicism, and more currently Mormonism.
Recall their adulation and adoration of that crucifix sealed in a jar of the 'artist's' urine, a proud result of the program that is called the National Endowment for the Arts. As I recall the 'artist' who created that slap in the face to all Christians named this loathsome piece 'The Piss Christ.'
These pinkos, who have sought to remove God from every public square for generations now, suddenly have been 'tetched by the Spirit?' Now, and only now, do they see the light? 'Let Muslims worship whenever and wherever they wish,' these newly enlightened Lefties proclaim, 'it is intolerant to think otherwise.'
We have news for you Lefties: for all of you Marxists, Socialists, Communists, Statists, Anarchists and Democrats, speaking for the majority of the people in this country who oppose building this victory mosque as a slap in the face for those who perished on 9/11, we want you to know that we all did not just fall off of the turnip truck yesterday.
We are aware that you don't give a lick about religious freedom. You just want to cheer those who hate America the way it was founded, just like you all hate America. These Muslims want to build this mosque as a victory memorial for their triumph on 9/11. In time, they want to establish sharia law over the land, and for most of you lefties, you are OK with sharia law; it has much in common with your values. Sharia severely restricts freedoms just like you lefties like to restrict freedom.
Where do you Lefties get off calling the rest of us 'intolerant?' That is like Rosie O'Donnell telling fashion model Kate Moss to 'lose some weight, tubby.'
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
'Moderate Muslims' and other ficticious characters
The now somewhat dated joke goes like this:
The Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, an al-Qaeda terrorist and a Moderate Muslim were all seated at a poker table, and were betting like dutch uncles on what turned out to be identical hands: Royal Flushes. The Easter Bunny had a Royal Flush in spades (Ace, King, Queen, Jack and Ten), the Tooth Fairy had the same hand, but in hearts, the al-Qaeda terrorist had a royal flush in clubs, and the Moderate Muslim had his royal flush in diamonds.
Who raked in the huge pot? The al-Qaeda terrorist, of course. The other three are just fictional characters.
Essentially, there is no such thing as a 'moderate Muslim.' Historically speaking, from a non-theologian's perspective, the story of Islam started with the prophet Mohammad receiving the verses of what became the Koran directly from Allah, beginning in 610 A.D. Within these verses, directly from Allah, are instructions for all obedient loyal followers to convert the rest of the world to Islam, and if conversion does not take place, then enslave or kill non-believers ('infidels').
Many Muslims today look the other way when this fact is presented to them. According to the Koran, these Muslims are not true believers, and are not adhering to the words of the Prophet and the wishes of Allah.
Perhaps this is just a technicality, and many religious scholars would argue that the ancient verses were figurative, and not literal. Still, they are there in the Koran to this day for anyone to see. And these words are not ambiguous. Calling Islam a religion of peace is just not what Mohammad and Allah had in mind for Muslims.
The cartoon above more accurately portrays the views of 'moderate Muslims:' they will watch as the fanatic beheads an infidel, but will rarely (if ever) condemn the fanatic for his actions. After all, this is specifically and literally called for in the Koran, the book by which ALL Muslims live, not just some Muslims.
Imam Rauf, the spokeman for the proposed Ground Zero mosque, is reported to be just such a 'moderate Muslim.' When he speaks to Arab speaking listeners, his message is very different than that he tells his English speaking audience. Imam Rauf is not a 'moderate Muslim.' He is a Muslim, period.
Accordingly, a 'moderate Muslim' belongs at that poker table every bit as much as the Tooth Fairy, the Easter Bunny and Santa: there ain't no such thing.
Monday, August 16, 2010
Pakistan: when you bite that hand that feeds you
Perhaps as many (or more) than twenty million (that's 20,000,000) Pakistanis are now homeless and destitute owing to the annual flooding that occurs at this time every year. This year, the flooding is greater than normal, and estimates place about 20% of the country under water.
Sunday, August 15, 2010
Poll indicates most Americans think securing the border impossible
A recent poll indicated that 61% of those polled thought that securing the southern U.S. border was impossible.
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Our culture is in trouble if we have to advertise values
I am confident you have seen many of the commercials that are being produced these days by 'The Foundation for a Better Life.' This one below, the young guy giving the older lady his seat on the bus, is typical. Each time I see these, I am amazed at how low our culture has sunk: we no longer as a nation teach our children respect for their elders, or anything else anymore.
Many more of these clips are put out by this group, encouraging us to not be jerks and assholes. Apparently, unless we see an ad on TV (over and over and over and over.....), we will behave in ways that are completely outrageous, antisocial and rude. The clips that The Foundation for a Better Life are currently running incessantly on nearly every channel around the clock (even Food Network) include:
1) a Downs Syndrome girl getting picked as Home Coming Queen at a high school prom.
2) after a new high school girl gets the cold shoulder in the cafeteria from the popular girls, a considerate girl comes over and has lunch with the jilted gal.
3) the newly wed guy sits down in a bar after a squabble with the missus, and the barkeep bolsters his spirits as to the 'good stuff' of life.
4) the jerk in high school knock the books out of the nerd's hands onto the floor, and the jock comes over and helps the nerd pick them up.
And on and on and on.....
Most of these ads target young people, in their teens and twenty's. I guess that is why I am amazed at the lengths and enormous advertising cost that this group goes through to convey the basic message: don't be an asshole. The parents of these high schoolers depicted in these ads must be in their early 40's, and accordingly are Generation X'ers. I, being a Baby Boomer, seem to have missed how poorly they must have raised their Generation Y kids, so that these antisocial miscreants crap on all of our notions of polite society. These Gen X parents completely fell down on the job of socializing their children, and now its up to the Foundation For A Better Life to pick up the slack. Or, perhaps worse yet, it's the Boomer's fault for raising such derelict kids that grew up to allow their children to behave like animals.
In my day ('by crackee'), if some jerk knocks the books out of somebody's grasp in high in front of the jocks in my early 1970's high school hallway, the jerk would have his face imprinted onto a locker door by the nearest jock faster than a case of 12-year old Scotch would disappear on the Kennedy compound (and believe me, that's fast). Of course, I was raised by 'The Greatest Generation' parents, and garbage like that shown in those commercials would simply not get tolerated for even a second.
Now we have to advertise on television to make our kids aware that it is not OK to be an asshole?
If we keep on this current generational path of ambivalence towards our children's socialization, in a few generations we will turn into savages and cannibals, eating each other willy nilly since nobody taught us any better. And I am guessing that is the conclusion that the folks at The Foundation for a Better Life came to as well, and are doing their best to change the direction of things to come.
Still, it's pathetic that we have to shape good values by advertising them on TV. I have to wonder if these ads are having a positive effect.
Time will tell.
Friday, August 6, 2010
'American Independents:' Dumbest of the Dumb
And we all thought Republicans are pretty dumb. Well, they are. But at the top of the heap of stupid citizens, one would have to put the American Independent as the dumbest of the dumb.
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Monday, August 2, 2010
Are Democrats smarter than Republicans?
I would argue that, given the political landscape and its makeup over the last 50 years or so, Democrats are indeed smarter than Republicans. Look around: polls indicate that around 40% of all voters consider themselves conservative or conservative leaning. 20% call themselves Progressives (liberals) or progressive leaning. That leaves the remaining 40% of squishy independent or independent leaning fence sitters. Monday, July 26, 2010
'Don't Feed The Bums'
Many of you are familiar with our national park system, and the many signs always posted in Yellowstone, Yosemite and Grand Teton national parks “Do not feed the bears.” What happens when tourists hand out to mooching bears handfuls of goodies in their picnic baskets? You get more and more mooching bears. Bears are not stupid, and neither are professional bums, for the most part. And when I say 'professional bums,' you know who I mean; the scuzzy moochers who beg for money on every major metropolitan street corner as a way of life. Both of these populations - bears and bums - exhibit predictable behaviors: give them freebies, and the word spreads that freebies are afoot. Pretty soon, the place is crawling with moochers - both bums and bears.
Speaking of begging, this phenomenon begs the question: just how do we as a nation go about dealing with our ‘professional bum infestation' in the United States these days? What should we do with them? Scoop them up and hose them off? Put them to work…?
How about we just stop as a nation supporting the ‘bumly’ way of life?
Like all living creatures, bears will choose the easiest way to survive, and not waste any unnecessary energy in inefficient ways. Scrounging for low caloric foods such as nuts, berries and grubs is highly inefficient when they have access to an alternative unending stream of tourists who toss them fat and sugar laden high caloric yummies such as turkey drumsticks, slices of cherry pie and Hostess Twinkies. With such feasts laid out in the parking lot for the taking, only the dumbest of bears are still out foraging for berries and grubs. The bears with any brains whatsoever are hanging out in parking lots and other places where tourists feed them like kings.
When tourists feed bears at our national parks, these bears no longer forage for natural sources of food, but rather congregate in great numbers near their human benefactors, where they become at best a nuisance, or at worst dangerous.
So it is with bums, and there is no perceptible difference between the behaviors of these two species of mammals. Like any other mammal, they will flourish in environments where the pickings are easy. And our professional bums are doing just that. They typically hang out where they are most visible, likely in urban settings, and beg for money from passers by. They are sure to make themselves look as pathetic as possible, and have their sad sack, down on their luck stories polished to a highly toned presentation.
What happened to all of those bears that were congregating in the parking lots of our national parks? Once the park service started cracking down on bear feeding by clueless tourists, did we see bears dropping dead by the hundreds of starvation, clogging the parking lots with their dead corpses? Did the park service personnel have to stack up dead bear bodies like cord wood? Of course not. These bears, once the food supply dried up, simply moved on in search of better and more reliable fare.
Governor Tommy Thompson (R-WI) started several programs such as these in Wisconsin several years ago, and once they were originally proposed, liberal bleeding heart opponents wailed and gnashed their teeth at the cruelty of such draconian measures, predicting that the homeless and forlorn would die in the streets in great numbers. Remember that prediction? They said that if these mean spirited measures were enacted, the loss of lives and mass starvation would be shocking.