Please answer the following math problems designed for the compassionate, caring and informed portion of the American public (also known as progressives or liberals). Answers are below:
1. If John has a welfare check in the amount of $577.83, Mary has a food stamp debit card with a $1,118.06 balance, and Bill has an unemployment check of $683.74, and they pooled their resources towards the purchase of the American Dream car, the Chevrolet Volt, what would be the balance due on their Chevy Volt if they applied their money as a down payment on the total value of the car of $46,855.90?
2. By shutting down an evil polluting coal fired electric power plant in Springfield which powered 2,000 households, and diverting irrigation water from 75,000 acres of farmland in River City in order to save an endangered minnow's threatened habitat, how many citizens are now free to move about the country in search of their dreams, instead of killing the earth with pollution and killing off Gaia's helpless creatures by their wicked human activities?
3. Community A raised property taxes on all households with incomes above $74,250.00 (widely considered rich, and therefore evil) to 50% on each assessed dollar of property value. According to the County assessor's office, doing so would generate $5 Billion dollars in additional revenue. In a school district of 7,000 enrolled children, how many free breakfasts (that cost the district $9 per meal), lunches (that cost the district $15 per meal) and dinners (that cost the district $22 per meal) are now available to previously starving and wretched kids, now that all of this excess money that the rich evil people don't need has been wisely diverted into a deserving program?
1. This question is tricky, but for the savvy among us progressives, the answer is clear: Mary's food stamp card is not technically eligible to fund non-food related activities. But since the purchase will assist in saving the environment, all parties to this transaction will look the other way and condone the application of the entire balance to this worthwhile purchase that will save us all in the long run.
2. The number of freed souls released to pursue happiness instead of evil is irrelevant: what is important is that the evil of pollution and killing of Gaia's creatures has been thwarted by good intentions. That is all that matters in this question.
3. The information is incomplete in this question to form an answer. Now that children are fed breakfast lunch and dinner, they really have no need to come home during the week, and accordingly additional funds must be obtained (presumably by raising the tax assessment to 75% of each dollar of property value from those rich SOB's) so that barracks can be built on the school site to accommodate the children during the school week. They can visit their parents on weekends, but it might be brought up at the next school board meeting on extending the food program to the weekends as well.
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