Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Liberals pursue development of the best non-fossil fuel ever: Pixie Dust!!

The Obama administration just threw $535,000,000.00 of our taxpayer money at a non-proven energy company, Solyndra, and watched this investment in the future go up in smoke. 

He wants Americans to use something else besides fossil fuels and nuclear energy, even though nothing else we know of can replace them.  And why?  Because this is the agenda of the crazy, far left tree hugger hippies and they happen to be a Democrat constituency group whose votes he covets. 

We all know that Obama does not like nuclear energy, coal energy, natural gas energy, and in particular he absolutely LOATHES petroleum, that evil energy source that evil conservatives call the life blood of capitalism.  More accurately, I should say his constituency group of tree hugging hippies loathes all of those energy sources.  All of these evil, antiquated energy sources give Obama the heebie jeebies: if he promotes them, then 'POOF!'  There goes the support of the tree huggers.  Accordingly, he's convinced that all of these are dangerous and harmful to the planet.  None of this stuff is any good, Obama obediently states.

What does he like?  Well, with Solyndra for example, he thinks that solar energy is the way to go, and that we as a nation should subsidize this form of renewable energy to the hilt.  And he did.  And we can all see what happened.  It kinda fizzled.  Because in reality, rather than in the nebulous child-like world of Utopian dreamers where this foolish dream energy can power the airline industry, this technology is in Realville, USA nowhere near becoming a reality.

He also likes wind power.  Ditto his administration's subsidization of all things wind driven, and the results are similar to that of solar energy: jack squat.  The technology just isn't there yet.  But that doesn't stop this administration from funneling a gazillion or two of tax payer dollars into its further development.  We'll all be standing by to reap the rewards of this investment.  That is, if the wind continues to blow all the time.  Which it doesn't. 

I have noticed that we have as a nation been ignoring a major source of energy that is not particularly new, but nevertheless efficient and exciting: Pixie Dust!  It has many names, such as Fairy Dust, Magic Dust and others, but the technology is the same: sprinkle it on something, and it flies, or turns into something spectacular.  Simple technology, really, but it has been overlooked for decades in favor of fossil fuels, which tend to pollute.  No polution has been detected with the use of Fairy Dust in any application we've seen so far.

Witness Dionne Sanders hawk DirectTV services while sporting fairy wings and throwing gobs of the sparkly stuff at a TV screen using cable programming, and VOILA: Green Bay Packer games shown in Miami, Florida! Shazzam! Magic!!  Need I say more to convince even the most rigid sceptic that this is the energy source of the future?

I think not.    

We need to harness this exciting form of energy.  And we as a nation need to man up and acquire the national gumption to fund wide scale development of Pixie Dust.  Imagine the benefits all Americans could enjoy with a never ending supply of Pixie Dust.  We have seen Peter Pan, Wendy, Tinker Bell and all of their friends fly around and do magical things under power of Pixie Dust.  We have seen Mary Poppins, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and Herbie the Volkswagen do amazing things under the power of Pixie Dust.

With some well funded national resolve, we can now channel our national resources to obtain a never ending supply of Pixie Dust, if only we could fully fund its discovery and exploration.  And that does not come cheaply, fellow Americans.  We must muster some resolve, verve and moxie to dig deep into our pockets to harness this newest form of non-fossil fuel that is so promising.

Wind power cannot lift a Boeing 747 (Air Force One) off the ground even 1 inch.  Neither can solar power, wave power, switch grass or any other tree hugger hippie juice.  But Pixie Dust can! 

What are we waiting for?  Let's go for it, and soon we will bear the fruits of this endeavor together, and we can drive Pixie Dust cars, power Pixie Dust aircraft carriers and bring to bear against our enemies Pixie Dust  fueled tanks and fighter jets.

All that is standing in the way of this Utopian dream is a few trillion dollars or so.  Let's get on with it!


Silverfiddle said...

Fredd: I am four-square against your pixie dust idea. That is the fuel that powers the liberal agenda!

Kid said...

Thorium Based Molten Salt Reactors on every corner.

No waste, no chance of meltdown.

But yea, still need the black icky stuff for the car and airplane travel. Or maybe if someone actually finds some Unicorn poops, we can get 100 million to work and back everyday on that.

Fredd said...


Yes, you are correct. Pixie Dust is actually composed of 50% hope, and 50% change.